How to Handle a Flirty Professor.Youve got problems, Ive got advice.This advice isnt sugar coatedin fact, its sugar free, and may even be a little bitter.Welcome to Tough Love.Youve got problems, Ive got advice. on this page. This advice isnt sugar coatedin fact, its sugar free, andRead more Read.This week we have a college student who is wondering if her professor is flirting with herand she doesnt like it.Keep in mind, Im not a therapist or any other kind of health professionaljust a guy whos willing to tell it like it is.Optimize your storage and back up your files because the Windows Fall Update is just around the corner.At the IFA Keynote in Berlin Terry Meyerson, VP of the Windows.Youve got problems, Ive got advice.This advice isnt sugarcoatedin fact, its sugarfree, and may even be a little bitter.Welcome to Tough Love.We all know that being seen as confident, but not cocky, at work can have a positive effect on our careers.From oneonone meeting with your boss to giving a.How To Install Dragon Age Mods From Nexus 6P' title='How To Install Dragon Age Mods From Nexus 6P' />I simply want to give you the tools you need to enrich your damn lives.If for whatever reason you dont like my advice, feel free to file a formal complaint here.Now then, lets get on with it.Im in college. My professor never really bothered me before, but now Im starting to question him.I changed my hair to red one day and he complimented how nice it was even though I hated it.I have never seen him comment on anyone elses appearance.A few days later I dressed up pretty fashionable and changed my hair back to black cause I was going out that night with my boyfriend and he said, Wow another look, Nice I brushed it off.Then, another time in class, I was talking to my friend and asked her to call me by my nickname.He overheard, asking me why I didnt ask him to do that.I just told him I found no reason to, but ever since then he calls me by my nickname anyway.He also gave us a quiz and one of the questions asked what we thought he could do to make the class better.I said one day out the week for tutoring would be nice.Heres where things get a little weird.When he handed back our quizzes, he made sure to let me know I was the only one he responded back to on the quiz.When I read his little response it said, Okay, lets try to do that, my nickname.Its a pleasure having you in class.Is he flirting Sincerely,Not Hot for Teacher.Hey Not Hot for Teacher Heres the deal if you think hes flirting, hes flirting.So, if youre getting that creeper vibe, thats enough to say he is.I think hes flirting and I cant even see his body language or anything.He calls you by your nickname when you didnt ask him to, he takes care to notice your appearanceand keep track of itand he makes comments on said appearence, directly to your face.Plus, the weird note on your quiz.Thats a little inappropriate there, Professor Horndog.But heres the nail in the coffin hes not doing these things to anyone else or so you say.I mean, if he was, it would still be inappropriate, but its obvious hes shown a specific interest in you, lady.And it sounds like youre not interested in his version of extra credit.So, the real question is what do you do about it For one, I wouldnt attend his romantic solo tutoring session created specifically for you.If hes saying those things in front of people imagine what he might sayor dowhen its just you two in a room alone.Ew. He may not actually be a total creep, but youre probably better off getting tutoring from a classmate if he makes you uncomfortable.Think about ityou wont be able to focus and learn when youre on your guard the whole time.Beyond that, you have two options.The first, which isnt ideal, is to ignore him until this class is over.If you wont see him again after this semester, just keep your head down, do your classwork, and move on.But if hes an adviser or a regular professor of yours, thats not really an option.And I think youre better off doing something about it, so.The second option, Not Hot for Teacher, is to tell him that what hes doing makes you uncomfortable.Dont make a display out of it.Do it in private during office hours and say, Mr.Horndog but actually use his name, it makes me uncomfortable when you use my nickname and make comments about my appearance.Id appreciate it if youd stop.Now, hell probably get defensive and say that he didnt mean anything by what he said, but it doesnt matter what he meant.Say, Its fine, you dont have to explain.Id just like you to stop.Thanks. Remember, youre not debating his intentions with him, youre telling him how you feel about it, and as your teacher he needs to respect thatperiod.He may not be aware that hes making uncomfortable.While you feel a little harassed, he may think youre cool with it in his creeper brain.Until you say something, hell probably continue.Whatever you choose to do, keep a record of everything he says to you, and when.If you choose to ask him to stop, keep a record of that as well.That way youll have plenty of evidence in case this situation escalates and it needs to be taken to a higher power.You never know. You might dress well, have a cool job, and be blessed with beauty, but flirting is where the realRead more Read.Thats it for this week, but I still have plenty of blunt, honest advice bottled up inside.Tell me, whats troubling youIs work getting you down Are you having problems with a friend or a coworker Is your love life going through a rough patch Do you just feel lost in life, like you have no direction Tell me, and maybe I can help.I probably wont make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but sometimes what you need is some tough love.Ask away in the comments below, or email me at the address you see at the bottom of the page please include ADVICE in the subject line.Or tweet at me with Tough.Love Also, DO NOT EMAIL ME IF YOU DONT WANT YOUR REQUEST FEATURED.I do not have time to respond to everyone just for funsies.Til next time, figure things out for yourself.How to Change Your Voice to Sound More Confident.We all know that being seen as confident, but not cocky, at work can have a positive effect on our careers.From one on one meeting with your boss to giving a presentation to the whole team, your voice is one of the most important parts of project confidence.Heres how to adjust your voice so that how you say something has as much impact as what you say Evaluate Areas to Work On.You may not need to work on all of the following issues, but thinking about each area and how you measure up gives you concrete things to work on.If you have trouble evaluating your own voice or way of speaking, ask a friend or trusted colleague to help, or record yourself speaking to get a more objective sense of your own habits.Tone The way you say something often has an impact on what people actually hear.Two of the most common examples are vocal fry heres a video example from the BBC and up speak, or using a higher pitch at the end of sentences similar to the tone used when asking a question.Not coincidentally, both of these traits that are thought to undermine credibility are commonly associated with female voices.Speaking Cadence If you speak very quickly or without many pauses, it can come across as nervousness.Try these exercises to help you have more deliberate articulation.Volume Speaking too softly or too loudly does not project confidence.You want to aim for a volume slightly above your normal speaking level so that youre clearly heard without coming off as abrasive.Filler words Um, ah, and like are all common filler words that keep what youre saying from flowing smoothly.Try these exercises from a professional public speaking coach to cut down on your own filler words.Vocal tics The area you may need the most help from a friend in analyzing is common phrases or vocal tics you have.Maybe you use the same phrase when youre buying time to think, like, Thats a great question.Or you could be undermining yourself with phrases like, Sorry to interrupt.Im not sure if this matters, but.Toastmasters has a great PDF guide and Six Minutes lays out breathing and vocal exercises you can do to generally improve your vocal presence.For example, to work on your resonance Raise your volume a bit and say Mmmmmmmmy name is Repeat this ten times up and down your vocal range.Once you know where you need to improve, get to work building new habits by practicing as much as possible.Practice New Habits.Changing the way you speak is difficult, but the more you practice, the easier it will be for you to build new habits.After a while, projecting confidence should become second nature.Since you might not have presentations or other opportunities to practice often, here are some other situations where you can test out your new techniques Chatting with colleagues While you dont necessarily need to project a ton of confidence around the water cooler, small talk with coworkers gives you a low stakes situation in which to practice.Sharing your ideas during meetings Having your ideas heard and respected can be influenced by how confident you sound while laying them out.Next time you share an idea, focus on at least one of the areas you want to improve.Giving feedback When giving feedback about someone elses work or skills, make a conscious effort to practice for at least one of the areas you want to improve on.Eventually, you want to get to the point where your confident tone positively impacts how seriously your feedback is taken.Asking questions Whether at a meeting, during a training, or at a networking event, this is a very quick way to practice your vocal confidence.I love explaining things to small groups of people and through writing on the web, but when itRead more Read.Consider Other Confidence Boosters.Beyond your voice, you can work on other things to present yourself as confident and come across better at work.Take up space Stand with your feet hip or shoulder width apart, keep your spine straight but not frozen, youre not a robot, and try to use arm and hand gestures as you naturally would when talking.Improve eye contact When speaking to a group, make eye contact with different people in the audience for about 3 5 seconds each.In a one on one situation, its okay to glance away and then make eye contact again if you feel things getting awkward.Use open body language Dont cross your arms, stuff your hands into your pockets, or cross your legs.Keeping your body relaxed and open makes you look at ease and confident.Its not easy to change your behavior, including the way you speak, so be patient with yourself and try to put into practice your new habits as frequently as you can.
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